OK people out in blogger land…here is the deal…I have to say
that life is stressful enough but when you add travel on top of it …life pretty
much BLOWS! So first off let me just
rant about how getting up (at the butt crack of dawn) sets the day off in suck mode
to begin with and then add on top of that a very upset toddler (she has to stay home
with her time challenged dad who is doomed to make her look like some deranged version of
Pippy Longstocking by the time she finally makes it to school…she knows this is
her fate… hence the melt down!), getting in to your husband’s truck only to
find that it is yet AGAIN on FUMES, and then add the (of course because this is
my luck today) the traffic from hell, I just want to turn right back around and
go right the F* back home! So when I finally
make it to the airport I have totally forgotten that it is the day after Easter
and everyone and their mother (literally…it’s Easter) is traveling back to
where they clearly hatched from so the lines are extremely long and painful…again…just
want to tell my manager that I have food poisoning and had to… oh I don’t
know…go to the ER to get treated for a sucking chest wound or do something clearly less painful because anything is
better than this disaster area at this point!
Any hoo…my only saving grace with all of the commotion was that I got to
people watch and observe how other people handle the great and pleasurable air port TSA line! It was pretty entertaining…first off let me
tell you that children and parents (no matter what the age) should NEVER
travel together EVER! I witnessed more
yelling, screaming, and crying (those were the parents BTW) than when we took
our family to Disneyland! Oh…you all in
blogger land are like “Disney is the happiest place on earth..” I beg to
differ…I witnessed more parents threatening all sorts of bodily harm to their offspring during that "wish upon a star" vacation and don’t
get me even started on the crying! Holy
Crap! I saw more children upset there
than when I had to take my daughter to get her Swine Flu Virus vaccine at the
local pediatricians office! Sorry Disney
if you are reading this, but you might
want to find another Mission Statement…thinking that you might want to join forces with the
Air Lines and come up with a better one because clearly both of you need to come
up with a better way to make us happy because let's face it...we are miserable here people! OK enough about crying parents…I also have to
add that when people give you advice to dress comfortably when you travel you
should really ask them for some clear guidelines because let me tell you that
rule can be interpreted in many grotesque ways!
First of all…I am clearly NOT a fan of wearing your PJ’s out in public
but let me tell you how many people I saw not only wearing their pajama’s but
also carrying around their pillows like this was some massive sadistic slumber
party! I have to tell you that if this
was my slumber party my mother would have been screeching for everyone to
get the F* OUT! It would be so loud that
everyone would flee the building like it was on fire…oh BTW I would be leading that pack…have been a
witness/target to the banshee screaming and it is so NOT pretty! Fleeing is the best option here! Also…what is the deal with people wearing
yoga/skin tight spandex pants and (again a rant about spandex here) tight
fitting sports tops? From the looks of the rolls that were erupting from the
seams those babies have clearly not seen the gym or a yoga class in ages so why
try to act the part?! I fail to believe that being crammed into a tube like a
sausage is considered comfortable!? My
poor eyes are in shock from what they were forced to endure…and last but not
least, why oh why do people think that it is OK to wear clothing that is
clearly not age appropriate? Like I
don’t know…. why can’t people (both
young and old) refrain from donning daisy dukes and crop tops at the
airport?! True statement
people…witnessed it this morning!
Again…I am having a hard time understanding how any of these outfits
scream COMFORT?! I just don’t get
it…maybe I am getting old and this is normal?!
I am hoping not…I am hoping that it is everyone else and not me…those
are famous last words from someone that is clearly in denial…like me! Sheesh!
I am hoping the flight back will be better…it’s has to get better
right? Again famous last words…
What am I listening to while I rant from thousands of
feet up in the air: Airplanes, by B.o.B (featuring
Hayley Williams of Paramore)
No comments:
Post a Comment