I am having one of the worst days ever! I mean one of those days where you are like...”I should have never gotten out of bed today because my day has been so crappy” days! It all started with the all elusive alarm clock...you know that trusty thing that is supposed TO WAKE YOU UP? Yeah in theory it is a great invention, the only glitch is that it is not child proof! So my daughter apparently was playing with the alarm clock...now you all in cyber blogging land are all like “why in the hell would you let your 2 year old play with your alarm clock?” Yeah...well my husband was watching her...need I say more? I had no idea that she was farting around with my alarm clock, so stupid me, does not check the time of the alarm, I just set it like I normally do, and then pass out. You know when you wake up, and you are like “...hmmm I wonder what time it is?” and then you roll over blink a couple of times because you are still trying to focus on those bright blue digital lights that are flashing at you, and as you focus on what appears to be a 7 instead of a 5, you kind of start wig out as the realization hits that you are sooooo freaking late? Bingo...that is what happened to me this morning! Why is it that every time you are in a hurry everything takes so much longer to do? I swear that it took me a butt load longer to get ready than I normally do, and when I go to get in the car, ah yeah, there is no gas in it! Really? I have to go on a husband rant here...why is it that whenever you have to get in your husband's car it NEVER has any gas in it? I mean this car was sooo low it was on like fumes, and I was like SERIOUSLY? So I squeal out of the drive way like my ass is on fire, all the while praying that I can make it to the gas station, and when I get there, of course there are NO lanes open! I am like beating the steering wheel at this point, and as I wait in line behind the slowest person on the planet, I am like tapping my fingers on the staring wheel, as I stare down the clock, all the while thinking how screwed I am that I am late! Finally the dude gets in his truck and so when I finally get to the gas pump and I put my ATM card in, I notice that there is a sign telling me that the pay at the pump is broken, so NOW I have to go inside to pay!? By this time, I am thinking to myself, that I must have really done something bad to someone or something to get this type of karma come my way! While contemplating all of the ill acts that I have done to people, and who might actually be a practicing voodoo priestess, I wait the 10 minutes to pay, and then finally get my gas. Thinking that the day, has to get better, I pull out of the gas station and proceed the whole 7 miles to work, and as I approach the freeway, I realize that the freeway is closed, and that I have to take a detour...yeah...they make me turn around and go back the way that I just came! By this time,. I am contemplating getting my own voodoo doll and just torturing myself...what the hell? I finally make it to work, and when I finally swoop into the work place, and try to settle down, I catch my nail on drawer, and break it so far down that it is now bleeding! At that very moment, I was at my last string of sanity, and as I sat there sucking on my finger, while I frantically searched through my purse for a band aid, I told myself that I should have NEVER got out of bed! If I told you that my day got any better, I would be a lying sack of crap because work is never fun, but the good thing is that my day is almost over, and as I close out this bloggary, I can safely say, that not one more bad thing can happen to me...well that is unless my computer takes a dump and I lose this lovely vent fest called a blog post! So if this is posted, you all in cyber blog land will know that at least my computer is dependable...thank God at least something worked in my favor today!
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